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wednesday's child, ever full of woe
tragedies and maladies she can't let go
now she wanes with a brain so slow
memories and miseries that dissipate like snow
wednesday's child, born that cursed day
took one look around and she wished herself away
lost that lot, you don't get another say
child of misfortune that will never be okay
"What passing-bells for these who die as cattle?
— Only the monstrous anger of the guns.
Only the stuttering rifles' rapid rattle
Can patter out their hasty orisons."
wednesday's child, is she truly doomed?
has nothing to do so she's locked up in her room
making loud music, keeping quiet to her dad
lies inside her head saying no one understands
wednesday's child, poor pitiful thing
going to the park and jumping off the swing
feeling all the air breeze through her hair
falling to the earth, finally without a care
"No mockeries for them; no prayers nor bells;
Nor any voice of mourning save the choirs,—
The shrill, demented choirs of wailing shells;
And bugles calling for them."
wednesday's child, going on and on
she tries to do right but goes about it all wrong
drains her sorrow in nicotine and bongs
muscles giving in and she wishes she were strong
wednesday's child, ever full of fear
wishes to be better and wishes she weren't here
she's fought for so long but her thoughts are getting weird
makes a vow and takes a bow and curtain shuts to cheers
wednesday's child, is she truly doomed?
has nothing to do so she's locked up in her room
making loud music, keeping quiet to her dad
lies inside her head saying no one understands
wednesday's child, poor pitiful thing
going to the park and jumping off the swing
feeling all the air breeze through her hair
falling to the earth, finally without a care
"What candles may be held to speed them all?
Not in the hands of boys, but in their eyes
Shall shine the holy glimmers of goodbyes."
flashback to black, there's a lack of love under these covers
galaxy imprints on the wall and ceiling and i
reach for you close, skin so warm, no more clothes and i'm feeling
naked to you, to your eyes and pisces mind and
once upon a time, we were tight-knit, with commitment
lovers adorned on our necks with this silver pendant
my gift to you on our first anniversary
and flowers in purple, your old favorite, now i don't know
all the months i gave to you
and all the times i got you through
and all the rhymes i wrote for you
and every little bit of love and
and everything i'm dreaming of
and then you go and shove it all away
please, can you hear me for fuck's sake?
all the times, the good, the bad
the ugly, what we almost had
and now i think of you and i
can't help but give a little cry
'cause i thought you might be the one
but i guess i just wasn't fun
so whatever, i'm clearing out my cache
guess i wasn't fun, now my heart is on the run
gave you all my love, and i come away with none
guess i wasn't fun, it's whatever 'cause i'm done
metal to my temple, pull the trigger of the gun
cut to the present, there's a distinct lack of you
and i have more questions than answers, cut back to
that scene, that bad dream, on a sunny day in april
when i got my blood drawn, you sat me down
and ended it all
only 20 minutes, and 3 days of consideration
lovers adorned on our necks with those silver pendants
now mine's in the drawer, 'cause no longer are we lovers
why'd you do this to me? do this to us? and all we knew? so-
all the months you gave to me
and getting me through everything
it's just not fair, the wear and tear
why do you get to disappear?
i wanted something that would last
not remnants of a darkened past
so please come back, and apologize to me
all the times, the good, the bad
the ugly, what we almost had
and now i think of you and i
just feel like ripping out my eyes
so i will never have to see
your face, or your anatomy
i just don't care anymore, you're such a bore
all the woes and all the throes of
smashing up someone's young love
and throwing every piece into the
trash and now someone will cash in
every little win, and every little sin
i feel on top, so why do i feel so low?
all the fears and all the tears and
all the beers, it all appears and
suddenly i understand that
you are not what life had planned, and
even though it's tragic, you will vanish just like magic
so begone, so long, you only did me wrong
guess i wasn't fun, it's whatever 'cause i'm done
metal to my temple, pull the trigger of the gun
manic highs, feeling the rise
romantic roller coaster ride
depressive lows, lack of control
i'm feeling down, i'm feeling slow
manic highs, the groans and sighs
the panic when you realize
depressive lows, life's many woes
convert it into purple prose
bipolar, a holy roller
high right now and full of dolor
full of color, run for cover
getting duller, rediscover
childish endeavors, and embarking in whatever
a lack of direction, lack of purpose
lack of drive and feeling worthless
euthymia is almost never
but it's cool, i'm fine, whatever
hospitals and medications
mourning rites and celebrations
genogram is full
and fruit falls from newton's hold
the disposition's prominent
the son of kurt vonnegut
up and then down
all around
endlessly a cycle
down and then up
had enough
waiting on st. michael
up and then down
all around
endlessly a cycle
down and then up
had enough
waiting on st. michael
euthymia is almost never
but it's cool, i'm fine, whatever
hospitals and medications
mourning rites and celebrations
genogram is full
and fruit falls from newton's hold
the disposition's prominent
the son of kurt vonnegut
manic highs, pleasant surprise
emboldened to behold our eyes
depressive lows, the ebbs, the flows
the polarizing equalize
manic highs, apostatize
and shed my shadow by moonrise
depressive lows, these episodes
now profit and serialize
bipolar, a high roller
who's harnessing the solar
growing up just like a flower
finally feeling empowered
but here comes the crash again
no more sails, no more wind
no more water, no more shores
only dread and static bores
up and then down
all around
endlessly a cycle
down and then up
had enough
waiting on st. michael
up and then down
all around
endlessly a cycle
down and then up
had enough
waiting on st. michael
structural dissociation
struggle with this cracked foundation
cultivated transmutation
traumatized collaboration
racked with some bad connotation
wish upon a constellation
pray for ego's conservation
an internal conversation
performing a magic act, now watch me disappear
watch me become somebody, someone new and strange and queer
performing like im singular and in the present tense
the multitudes are endless and the depth is immense
DID, a travesty
a blemish on my family
a burn hole in the tapestry
an eyesore for my sanity
DID, such majesty
in fracturing entirely
in recognizing tiredly
that there is something more to me
got a splitting headache like it's cracking into two
got some bats in the attic, losing every single screw
a troubling prognosis brought on by these tragedies
suck me down your throat until you're catching my disease
every stomach ache comes with a silver stomach lining
every heartbreak comes with some new nation that's dividing
no man is an island and the bell rings for this beat
acrid belly bile and neural rot secrete
looking in the mirror and not liking what i see
looking in the mirror and it's clearer, that face isn't me
it's some face that is misplaced and now i feel the need to flee
so i smash that fucking mirror and evade reality
because i am just so many and split in so many ways
never ever decide how i want to spend my days
because we are so torn, on the rack and in a daze
there's fractures in my blood my brain my body's dna
DID, a travesty
a blemish on my family
a burn hole in the tapestry
an eyesore for my sanity
DID, such majesty
in fracturing entirely
in recognizing tiredly
that there is something more to me
got a splitting headache like it's cracking into two
got some bats in the attic, losing every single screw
a troubling prognosis brought on by these tragedies
suck me down your throat until you're catching my disease
every stomach ache comes with a silver stomach lining
every heartbreak comes with some new nation that's dividing
no man is an island and the bell rings for this beat
acrid belly bile and neural rot secrete
got a splitting headache and i rip my scalp apart
it's so fleeting disagreeing like the beating of my heart
a dire sort of ire for the people in my head
whether it is nobler to be multiple or dead
every sort of breakdown brings about another split
chorus voices echo in my mind, i wish that they would quit
but if i had been alone throughout the days and months and years
there's a pretty good chance i'd succumb to all my fears